Remember the days when the thought of seeing someone with their pants hanging down the crack of their ass was almost enough to send you screaming; trying to gouge your eyes out with a rusty spoon? Or the horror of possibly your own that way? Then again, back in the day the people you saw that wore their pants that way were a horror show of their own. Usually fat, tubby dudes -or Buddha Bellies (guys that were skinny everywhere other than their stomachs who usually had no ass to speak of) in dirty white t-shirts and jeans to match who were there to fix the plumbing. Hence the term: "Plumber’s Crack".
Well thanks to the nineties teenage generation -and the fact that it seemed every other asshole (That wasn’t wearing a wife beater, anyway) on 'COPS' that got caught was because their pants were hanging down and falling off- all those preconceived notions are now a thing of the past. Plumber’s Crack Fashion was now the rage of all the cool kids.
Now I know what you’re thinking: ’Dude. You’re about a decade to late for this story.’ And you’d be right. The thing is, it seems now that everyone is into it. Not just the teens. Case in point:
I’m a photographer mostly. So I find myself at many events. Large and small. This particular one I was at recently was rather large. Now I’m just hanging out, minding my own business (for once) when I look over at this huge mural surrounded by class photos of the life of the school that was near me, where this woman was squatting down, ass all hanging out for the world to see. While I’m usually a fan of the old whale tail express the sight caused me to take pause a moment. This here was a woman who was closer to her early fifties than was to thirty-nine, who had to feel the draft coming through the backdoor and didn’t have a care in the world about it. And it wasn’t because she was older that gave me pause (Hell, I can give a shit), it was because I’ve been seeing this more and more. For whatever the reason I had just never really took notice before (maybe because there‘s so much of it). And it seems that Plumber Crack Fashion has become what breast implants where in the 1990s.
Is it because for the last decade or so we’ve become more and more a cougar nation? Where older woman who are still in their sexual peek, bored with the pot belly, beer gut husbands they seem to have to settle with that are more interested in sports than their wives. Or is it because they feel they need the edge over the younger ones that they catch their husbands ogling on the weekly trips to the store?
Whatever the reason it seems that older woman are joining the ranks of their younger peers when it comes to sporting ass cleavage more and more. Much to the determent of daughters everywhere who now not only have to compete with people their own age, but now have to with their undersexed horny mothers. Which could be plus in most men’s book. And who can blame them? Hey I’m all for it. As long as you don’t look like you stuffed a couple of eight year olds or a VW Bug down the back of your pants let those derrières fly free. And for all of you that are about to call me a hypocrite saying that when it comes to man-boobs the same doesn‘t apply, I say if your cup size is bigger than a B cup put a damn shirt on or a sports bra. Nobody wants to see man titties flopping around. That’s just disgusting.
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